April 22, 2023
My name is Whitney, I am a mom to a 11 year who keeps me very busy. He has just turned 9 in May of 2021, May 1st in fact. His dad and I had been separated for 5 years at this point but are still great co-parents and friends for our son. Gary (my now ex-husband) was home for the week, he is an over the road truck driver. Gary also used to be a firefighter.
The weekend of May we had a party for our son’s 9th birthday. we had a lot of fun with family and friends. The next day my son spent the day with his dad. My boyfriend at the time and I had gone to some property my family owns. it’s about 40 acers. we walk from the front of the property to the back. I felt great and was loving being outside. the next morning, my boyfriend and I got up to get ready for the gym. I told him I wasn’t feeling the best, he asks what was wrong, and I told him I just felt more tried than I usually do. he said he thought maybe it was because it was our 5th week going to the gym and to push through. we went and I did a full cardio workout. I remember thinking I should have pushed myself harder and being a little hard on myself that day. after the gym we realized at some point we had lost my boyfriends car keys. I told him I would take him to work and then go back up to the property to look for the keys.
After dropping him off at work my ex-husband had called talk to about his plans for him and our son for the week. I told him that I had to go look for the keys and he had asked about seeing fresh bear prints the day before. we had in fact seen some and he really didn’t like the idea of me going by myself so him and our son offer to go with, and I said that was a great idea. We got there, it’s at this point feel I should note that we are about 25 min from home and that also goes for the close’s hospital. once at the property we were met by my grandparents. my son asked to stay with his papa to work on the tractor, and we let him stay. we took off on our walk and at some point, my ex got a phone call and was walking in front of me. I was still feeling very tried and wasn’t walking as fast as normal. we weren’t really that far from where we started. we could still hear the main road but couldn’t see it. he was walking up a hill and still on the phone, was following be hide when I had a sharp pain in my chest. my first thought was wow that hurt but hey chest pain isn’t anything new and kept going for about two- or three more-feet up hill. Soon the pain was down my left arm and into the left side of my jaw, now I was thinking I can’t be having an actual heart attack. I tap my ex on the shoulder, and he just said to me without looking at me “I am on the phone one minute please.” at this point in a lot of pain and yes it was a very hot day for May, but I was sweating buckets, knew something was very wrong. I ended up taking my right hand and I bopped him on the back of the head, he turns around and was very upset. his face went from very upset to oh no something isn’t right. he told his mom who he had been on the phone with that he had to go and just hung up. he asked what was wrong I gave him all my symptoms.
He said I thinking you’re having a heart attack and I said back I think I am dyeing. he sat me down in the weeds and took off running to get my car. As I sat there, I first texted my boyfriend and told him what was going on. then just sat there. the pain was getting worst, and I was very scared, and I had two thoughts, one being this is my fate I am only 32, and the other being this is dyeing? where are my past loved ones? where is my white light? this isn’t at all how I want to die all alone in a place that has brought me so much peace and joy. soon he was back with the car and got me into it. it’s about 10 mins to the highway and about 25 mins to the hospital from there. we weren’t very far into our drive when I happen to hear something from the back seat and notice my son sitting there. I couldn’t believe he brought our son. about 5 mins after getting on the highway I started getting tunnel vision. I grab for my ex-arm and held it, thinking do not pass out. don’t pass out because his man will pull over, he will call 911 you could stop breathing and he will have to work you in front of your son.
I fought the whole way to stay awake. my ex had called his aunt to come get our son and she met use there and was standing on front of the er door when we came flying in, he told her to get a wheelchair. they got me into it and she left with our son.
sure, enough at 32 years old I told being told that I had in fact had an attack and was being sent to the closes heart center. my ex who I had said earlier was a firefighter had this look of fear with a little panic. he just looks at me and said I need to make calls. I ask if I could make one phone call to a friend who I knew would do better hearing it all from me. I remember calling him. I asked what he was doing he said oh just cleaning my kitchen, I asked him to go sit in his chair and he asked why. I told him I would tell him once I knew he was sitting in his chair, I heard him sit down and I said I’m sorry I have to tell you this over the phone, I had an attack, and I am being sent to the heart center an hour away. I could hear the air come out of him, I told him I was going to be ok, and I was in good hands. one on my ambulance drivers happen to be my cousin, oh the joys of small-town living.
Soon we were off to the heart center and my cousin stop in the hall and told that a whole team was going to come out and swarm over me. that it could be overwhelming, and he was in fact right. I started to cry, it was the first time I cry through that whole thing, I could hear my cousin voice boom over everything and everyone. He said nope we are not going to cry; we are going to get this done and then we are going to go fishing. they went in through my wrist and I hear the doctor say yup there is it. they took me to my room and was getting me all hooked up and set up I asked if I could call my ex-husband and boyfriend, they said I could and got me my cell phone. I ended up facetiming and as they were setting up me and talking on my phone, I felt like my heart tried to jump out of my chest. I made a funny sound and the nurse ask what was wrong. I told her and as I did so, all the alarms went off. the nurse sad sorry guy to my ex and my boyfriend who were on the phone and hung it up. I was having a lot of heart palpitations. over the next week I stayed in the heart center, and I missed my son and my family very much. I will say after that I fell into a dark place. it took me a year and half to get out of it.
I’m doing a lot better now. my life has gotten back on track.